Siddharth took out the phone and almost sent a "Good Night" message to Ragini when his hands stopped. He thought something for a while, deleted the message and kept the phone back in the pocket. He no more had the right to send this message. She had broken up with him.
Breakups can be painful. Siddharth had realized this the hard way. Three months had passed since he last heard from Ragini and he only knew how this time had passed. It appears that the days become shorter when you are together and too lengthier when you are apart. And this wasn't a separation of few days. It was a separation of lifetime. A life was to change. He thought he would get over it. But there seemed no end to the agony.
Love is also a very strange thing. If you are blessed with it, the whole world seems so joyful and life seems so purposeful. It can do great things. It can motivate you to do something which you have never done before in life. It makes you a better person. You will go out of your way to do something just to please your lover. And that feeling of satisfaction and joy is greater than the feeling when you do something for yourself. Perhaps it can't be expressed, just felt.
But without it everything seems so lackluster and painful. Siddharth wondered how suddenly everything had changed. Activities he enjoyed earlier failed to excite him any further. Is a separation so powerful that it can change the way a person thinks, behaves? What has changed after all? Anyways he was in a long distance relationship with Ragini and he used to meet her in months. What then had changed which caused a feeling of hollowness?
Perhaps it is the very nature of love itself. Being in a relationship for 5-6 years, Ragini had become a habit of his life. He did not realize when he became so much attached that he took this proximity for granted. His day started with wishing her a good morning as early as possible while still half asleep. Before she got ready for office and caught the bus, he would wish her day to be good. During the office hours, he tried to find out time to send her messages periodically, sometimes sending as silly messages as a plain "Hi". A day would end by a good night message.
All that had ended. A silly fight over a silly issue. Or so he thought. Perhaps it was much larger issue for her. Perhaps it was the question of principles for her. Too big to be forgiven. So big that the 6 years of relation seemed too small in front of it. A question of life or death maybe. Everything ended in a matter of minutes. Never to be resumed again.
Sometimes he woke up in the middle of night after a bad dream. But how he realized that the bad dream has come to life. He wants to shrug this as a nightmare but it doesn't leave him. And the worst thing about this condition was that he couldn't do anything to improve it. He felt so helpless.
Maybe even Ragini has the same feeling. Who knows if she did this out of some compulsion. Who knows if even she is suffering. But at the end of the day it doesnt affect anyone else. It's their lives which has changed. The world goes on as usual. Love demands courage and standing up sometime for the right things. For those who are lucky to understand this, it transforms their lives. And for those who are unlucky like Siddharth, it sucks the life out of them.
Breakups can be painful. Siddharth had realized this the hard way. Three months had passed since he last heard from Ragini and he only knew how this time had passed. It appears that the days become shorter when you are together and too lengthier when you are apart. And this wasn't a separation of few days. It was a separation of lifetime. A life was to change. He thought he would get over it. But there seemed no end to the agony.
Love is also a very strange thing. If you are blessed with it, the whole world seems so joyful and life seems so purposeful. It can do great things. It can motivate you to do something which you have never done before in life. It makes you a better person. You will go out of your way to do something just to please your lover. And that feeling of satisfaction and joy is greater than the feeling when you do something for yourself. Perhaps it can't be expressed, just felt.
But without it everything seems so lackluster and painful. Siddharth wondered how suddenly everything had changed. Activities he enjoyed earlier failed to excite him any further. Is a separation so powerful that it can change the way a person thinks, behaves? What has changed after all? Anyways he was in a long distance relationship with Ragini and he used to meet her in months. What then had changed which caused a feeling of hollowness?
Perhaps it is the very nature of love itself. Being in a relationship for 5-6 years, Ragini had become a habit of his life. He did not realize when he became so much attached that he took this proximity for granted. His day started with wishing her a good morning as early as possible while still half asleep. Before she got ready for office and caught the bus, he would wish her day to be good. During the office hours, he tried to find out time to send her messages periodically, sometimes sending as silly messages as a plain "Hi". A day would end by a good night message.
All that had ended. A silly fight over a silly issue. Or so he thought. Perhaps it was much larger issue for her. Perhaps it was the question of principles for her. Too big to be forgiven. So big that the 6 years of relation seemed too small in front of it. A question of life or death maybe. Everything ended in a matter of minutes. Never to be resumed again.
Sometimes he woke up in the middle of night after a bad dream. But how he realized that the bad dream has come to life. He wants to shrug this as a nightmare but it doesn't leave him. And the worst thing about this condition was that he couldn't do anything to improve it. He felt so helpless.
Maybe even Ragini has the same feeling. Who knows if she did this out of some compulsion. Who knows if even she is suffering. But at the end of the day it doesnt affect anyone else. It's their lives which has changed. The world goes on as usual. Love demands courage and standing up sometime for the right things. For those who are lucky to understand this, it transforms their lives. And for those who are unlucky like Siddharth, it sucks the life out of them.
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